How To Stay Young Forever

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August 29, 2011 by WITS Houston

Measuring Spoons

Image via Wikipedia


2 cups green goop

1 tablespoon squishy mud

1 teaspoon gravel

1 cup of water from a tree

1/2 cup of a man’s red beard

1 squiggle from the sun

1 1/2 cup paper


1.  Go to the beach.  Collect lots of seaweed. Squeeze into a container until you have 2 cups.  (If it’s too much, drink some.)

2. Go to the woods and find dirt.  (If you get too much, feed it to a caterpillar and watch it blow up!)

3.  Find a tree and squeeze the bark to get a cup of water. Put it into the dirt. Mix to make 1 tablespoon of mud.

4.  Go to a graveyard. Brush the gravestones and measure a teaspoon of gravel.

5.  Go to your dad and tell him to grow a beard. If it’s not red, dye it!

6. Get on a flying pony and head for the moon. Take a bite of the moon. Mix it with spit and put it in a water bottle.

7.  Go home and tear up paper to get 1 1/2 cups.  Mix well with the mud and gravel mixtures. Stir in the man’s red beard.

8.  Add the moon and everything else.  Stir thoroughly.

9.  Microwave for 300 years.

10. Mix well and eat.  You’ll stay young forever.

by Lauren, 3rd grade


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